I am what I am because of the MEN (and women but the title would have looked goofy with a slash in it) who have helped shape me and guided me to be my best self. These individuals have been both older and younger, male and female, but they all have one thing in common… they wanted to help me get better.

There are so many mentor programs that exist in the world today. I personally am responsible for one that partners students with other students. Additionally, I recently wrote a proposal for one that partnered incoming employees with existing employees. I even consulted on the creation of a faculty to student mentoring program at another college. In the world of higher education mentors are gold, and they equal retention and success for all involved.

The same is true in our communities. At church I have a mentor that I meet up with from time to time, to help guide me toward a better understanding of Christianity. There is the Boys and Girls Club in nearly every city that focuses on partnering a community member with youth in need of mentoring. Even in being a DAD I have my dad and father-in-law as well as friends that are interested in my parenting success and help mentor me toward being successful.

Putting it simply, mentors are everywhere and helping everyone! Here are three simple things to keep in mind when it comes to mentors in the workplace and at home.

Experience is a Great Teacher

When looking for a mentor you want to find someone that either has the experience you are seeking to gain or has the drive to accomplish said experience but is further ahead in the process than you. By identifying a role model that you can look up to, you are able to not only learn the path that they took to get to where they are today but also learn of the areas that caused them to stumble along their journey.

Being mentored by someone with experience in the field is easily applicable to the career path and has benefited me greatly to match up with a few individuals that have already accomplished what I hope to one day achieve. Some were already in the role, others I was fortunate enough to get to know at an early age when they were only slightly ahead of me in the process. I believe the same will be true of being a dad. I intend to seek out awesome dads, those individuals that are both excellent husbands (because this is step one to being a great dad in my belief) and amazing with their kids. As I find those great dads, I hope to strike up a conversation and learn from them what took them from Good to Great as Jim Collins so masterfully wrote in his book that I HIGHLY recommend. One must go beyond the first step in recognizing someone to seek out as a mentor, you must also ask them questions.

Be a Sponge

Once you have identified someone that inspires you to be a better DAD or a better employee, ask them to go to lunch or coffee. Tell them you have been blown away by their actions and how they live out what you hope to one day achieve. Then… ASK QUESTIONS! The more questions that you can ask the better. Make sure you soak in every response. This is especially true with topics that you are learning on, and many times if you have the right approach to life you are always learning something about a topic.

At the end of the meeting, ask to speak again sometime. Maybe you set something up on a regular basis. I know for me and one of my key mentors we never “set up a time” but about once a week when one of us was going for a walk or driving home from work we would call and check in to see how things were going. These conversations have been some of the most informative of my career and have helped put me on the trajectory to nearly be completed with my doctorate and to have a vision for what is next in my career. Sponges can go dry if you don’t get them wet again!

Now that I am a DAD I get to find mentors in this realm of my life. Hopefully, they will help me with retention and success of my child’s heart.  *note if you are fortunate enough to still have your dad as I am, they are indeed a great resource here*

Pay it Back, Pay it Forward

Once you have established and learned from your mentor, it is time to turn around and do the same. This is not saying you have it all figured out and no longer need your mentor, in fact, the opposite is true you will now get to ask them how to help guide someone else. All you need is to be slightly ahead of the person behind you and willing to admit when you don’t know, the last thing someone needs is a mentor with a ‘know it all’ complex.

By becoming a mentor, you continue to learn and grow in ways that you would have never thought were possible. I know mentoring some of the individuals I have had the pleasure to mentor has even proven more rewarding than being mentored.

Life Changing!

I believe in mentoring so much that I have made it into my dissertation and am researching the character traits that make successful mentors. Here is an early indicator, mentors have a desire to help others.

Mentoring has and will continue to change my life in such profound ways. I hope it will have the same impact on my daughter’s life and that I will get to be a great mentor to her.

I hope mentoring will have a significant impact on your life too.